Forget Letting Go – Hold on and Be Miserable

Forget Letting Go- Hold on and Be Miserable
Who wants peace when you can have chaos and turmoil? Why strive for simplicity when complicated drama can fill up your time and energy? I mean going to bed, turning off the light, sleeping soundly through the night is way overrated in my humble opinion. I prefer to toss and turn and take every little scenario and twist it into a thousand different possibilities.
I’ve read all the books, attended the seminars, drank the Kool-Aid, and yet, here I am – still struggling, still fighting negativity, still trying to let go. Trying to let go. You want me to let go of my past, my mistakes, my “story”, my insecurities, my childhood, and the list goes on and on. You tell me to let go and think positive. To follow my destiny, to live authentically, to create a vision board, and make sure to meditate and incorporate yoga…could one more thing be added to my already overflowing list?
To a perfectionist, letting go feels like a fantasy gone awry. There are simply too many reasons to hold on….
Reason #1: Letting go means people get a free pass. I mean, come on, I suffered because of their actions; they should suffer with my unwillingness to forgive and let go.
Reason #2: Letting go means the story doesn’t get replayed over and over in my head, and I can’t fantasize about all the different scenarios had I responded in one of a million different ways.
Reason #3: Letting go means the fantasy of what could have been will be erased and it will need to be replaced. That seems to be a lot of work.
Reason #4: Letting go means the need for micromanaging would disappear. That is too much free time for this soul. I can only go on so many Netflix binges.
Reason #5: Letting go means unloading the heavy burdens of my disappointments, my mistakes, my regrets. I’m just saying that I’ve built up a lot of muscles carrying all that stuff around.
There are five reasons, however, I could go on and on about all the benefits of holding on and encouraging negativity to find a home within my heart, my mind, and my soul. Reasons to stay in the misery and living life through 20/20 vision. For now, I think I am going to start taking the steps necessary to slowly let go and simply live without analyzing every little nanosecond. Perhaps then I will be able to write about the benefits of letting go and living happily.